Wednesday, July 25, 2018

Embers



 I have been thinking about Jesus....In fact wondering about Jesus happens a lot with me these days as well. I feel love and warmth when I bring Him up in my heart. I feel comfort, truth, and profound connection. I feel He is present in all that is good; all that is lovely in my life. I do not feel, however, like so many of my Christian friends feel about Him. All these years of reading scripture; of praying; of asking God to lead me in paths of truth have often lead me to crave the word and essence of Christ but not to see Him as the alter of all truth and the only portal by which I can reach my Father. That has never worked for me.

Once my brother and I sat at his kitchen table talking about Jesus.  and he demonstrated his view of who he believed is Jesus....He said that God is the purest, most powerful force...in fact too pure for us to even approach or conceive.  He is an unapproachable force trying to approach us. Haha....what a conundrum...He went on....taking a tissue he draped it down in one hand,  from about a foot above the table, showing that we could grasp the tissue, and that it could then be grasped on the other end by God. 

Jesus is that tissue, he suggested..... Jesus is that conduit.. allowing us to approach our unapproachable God......an apt comparison since my brother is an electrician, and terribly smart. He has this remarkably engineering-wired brain with a spark plug for a heart and a hunger for God like I have never known in another person, but me. I'd like to argue that point with him a little, from the perspective of my currently broken heart. Miranda Lambert has sweet thoughts on the sun...on how it is generative and life-giving....

Dear Old Sun

Well, you melt the snow

And you grow the roses
And you dry the tears
And you freckle noses
Our little world
Revolves around
You coming up and going down






Ah, but my brother Jesus is an ember....a glowing piece of  promise and possibility. Better for cooking, warming toes, curing, comforting. A place where you can sit and feel safe in a circle of others. Jesus is reachable, touchable...if you are careful. He comes to help humanity, as the ancients found when they discovered fire, launching them into a new age of  strength and abundance. Safe and familiar, but this that glow in the center reveals a supernatural burst of energy....magic. 


                                                                                    Embers are baby fires, waiting to be born.


Chemical reactions that could not be made to be without the initial touch of God.

Embers need to be noticed, fed, considered before they burst forth into a fire. Jesus kept saying...."I tell you this" as if to say....
"Stir me and see what you get"......





I guess I don't like the idea of exclusive clubs....never liked the idea that Jesus was saying we had to join the "special group" and that others would be locked out and denied God's LOVE. I don't think Jesus is like that...I don't think God is like that, come to think of it.







I rather like the idea of Jesus trying to explain to us, as he drew circles in the dirt with a stick, eyes twinkling with mirth at his own joy of talking in riddles.....

I am a glowing,
 vibrant,
chemically charged chunk of the sun....
stir me,
 put your hands close and feel the warmth,
 cook with me,
 sit by me,
 and notice how I bring you to a place of safety and solace.                                                                              

  


Not a gate-keeper as much as a scientist....
Not a judge as much as a snug blanket.....
Not a sacrifice as much as a demonstation.....
A sweet, warm chunk of a living God......
Just about the right size and temperature for a foolish girl to cup in her hands......
And I do....




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